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Marilyn Fayre Milos, Judy Kirkwood

Please Don't Cut the Baby: A Nurse's Memoir

Please Don't Cut the Baby: A Nurse's Memoir

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Marilyn Fayre Milos was a nursing student on the obstetrical unit in 1979 when she first witnessed a baby being circumcised. The only person to step forward to comfort the infant as it writhed and screamed in pain during the surgery, she was shocked when the doctor said to her: "There is no medical reason for doing this." From that moment on, Marilyn became an advocate for ending medically unnecessary circumcision, protecting our children, and educating parents, the public, and medical professionals about this cultural fraud and violation of human rights. She founded the National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers (NOCIRC); organized fifteen international symposia; and became a spokesperson for promoting the genital integrity of all children. A story of determination, service, and love, Marilyn's memoir describes the myths, misinformation, and economic forces driving non-religious infant circumcision in the United States, where it has become standard practice. Readers may find their own beliefs and assumptions challenged, and their hearts touched by this story of a life devoted to justice for babies and the adults they will become.

Social Activist Biographies | Medical Professional Biographies | Memoir

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Editorial Reviews

"This is the story of the Alma Mater (Nourishing Mother) of the movement to stop doctors worldwide from committing atrocities, which harm their patients for life."-George C. Denniston, MD, MPH, co-editor of NOCIRC's eight books of presentations from the International Symposia on Genital Autonomy and Children's Rights, co-editor of Say No to Circumcision!: 40 Compelling Reasons, and the founder of Doctors Opposing Circumcision

"Marilyn Milos's Please Don't Cut the Baby! A Nurse's Memoir is a timely book, appearing as it does amid growing bioethical and human rights concerns over non-therapeutic infant male circumcision and genital mutilation in general. Knowing, as we do today, that children, even before birth, are sentient, conscious, and remembering beings, the trauma inflicted upon them by such surgical interventions represents a life-long wounding on their bodies and psyches that will adversely affect them. Prevention trumps treatment. Future parents need to read this fine book."-Thomas R Verny, MD, DPsych, DHL (Hon), FRCP(C), FAPA, author of The Secret Life of the Unborn Child, The Embodied Mind

"In 1980, Ed Wallerstein dedicated his book, Circumcision: An American Health Fallacy, to 'healthcare providers who have already disavowed the necessity of routine newborn circumcision.' After advocating against medically unnecessary circumcision for decades, Marilyn Milos epitomizes the enlightened healthcare providers my father's book was dedicated to. Had he lived to see the publication of Please Don't Cut The Baby! A Nurse's Memoir, myfather would have whole-heartedly endorsed Marilyn's new book."-Les Wallerstein, JD, M.Psych


"Male and female circumcision is a crime, and to be more precise, it is the greatest crime committed by humanity against its weakest members. Knowing Marilyn Milos and her courage and persistence in tackling this crime, I would like to encourage everyone to read her book. I hope it will soon be translated into all languages so that this crime finally stops."-Sami Aldeeb Abu-Sahlieh, Doctor of Law, Centre de Droit Arabe et Musulman, author of Male & Female Circumcision Among Jews, Christians and Muslims: Religious Medical, Social, and Legal Debate


"When Marilyn Milos recruited me to join a team of doctors fighting infant circumcision at a conference in San Francisco in 1996, I had no idea what I was getting into. She helped reshape my career in wellness through activism. Over a quarter of a century later, as I delight in her long awaited memoir, I marvel at her abilities to inspire generations of men and women to take up the cause of genital justice. It's my fervent hope that it will inspire future generations to complete this work, even if they never are as lucky as I am to experience this force of nature firsthand."-John Travis, MD., MPH, Alliance for Transforming the Lives of Children (aTLC)


"The first dictum of ethical medical practice is 'Primum Non Nocere' (First Do No Harm). In contrast, much of the medical profession in the United States and other English-speaking countries has deliberately and knowingly violated this fundamental tenet of ethical medical conduct, by subjecting defenseless children to cruel and harmful circumcisions that can result in traumatic, lifelong psycho-sexual harm. This book about the tragedy of infant male circumcision illustrates the author's enormous courage, and that of other ethicists throughout the world, in tackling head-on this useless and harmful non-therapeutic sexual reduction surgery imposed on many non-consenting and defenseless minors, including normal, healthy baby boys."-Gregory J. Boyle, PhD, DSc, FAPS

About the Author

Marilyn Fayre Milos

Born in San Mateo, California, and professionally trained as a Registered Nurse at the College of Marin's School of Nursing, Marilyn Fayre Milos began campaigning against elective non-therapeutic circumcision of male infants when, as a nursing student in 1979, she witnessed the circumcision of a newborn baby boy. Once she researched the issue and realized that most of the world's males are not circumcised, the important protective, immunological, and sexual functions of the foreskin, and the harmful consequences of inflicting pain and trauma on a newborn baby, she began giving parents accurate information about circumcision. Due to her commitment to informed consent, she was forced to resign from her position as a post-partum nurse at Marin General Hospital in 1985. Milos co-founded NOCIRC (National Organization of Circumcision Information Resources Center that same year. As executive director of NOCIRC, Milos coordinated 15 International Symposia on Genital Autonomy, emphasizing circumcision of infants and children as a human rights issue. NOCIRC's name was changed to Genital Autonomy-America in 2016 to reflect its mission to protect the bodily integrity of every child (female, male, and intersex). She is a member of the advisory board of Your Whole Baby and a member of the Board of Directors of Intact America. After leaving the world of hands-on nursing in 1985, Milos was given the California Nurses' Association Award for Clinical Excellence in Perinatal Nursing in April 1988 for her dedication and unwavering commitment to righting a wrong. NurseWeek magazine honored Milos with its Nursing Excellence Award for Patient Advocacy in May 2001 and Mothering Magazine recognized Milos as "A Living Treasure" in its March 2008 issue. She received Intact America's Award for Humanitarian Service in 2009 and the Trustbirth Initiative Lifetime Achievement for Protecting Newborns in March 2010. In May 2015, Milos was honored as a "Living Legend" at the 2015 BirthKeeper Summit in Berkeley, California, for her work to end male, female, and intersex genital mutilation. Marilyn raised four children and has three grandchildren, and lives in Forest Knolls, Marin County, California.

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Judy Kirkwood

Award-winning writer and editor Judy Kirkwood has worked on numerous book projects in a range of fields as a ghostwriter, cowriter, developmental and copy editor, and book doctor for over three decades. She is also the author of hundreds of lifestyle and health articles for dozens of publications and websites. Kirkwood was a major contributor to thirdage.com, a health and wellness site for women, and on the original Parent Advisory Board for Partnership for a Drug-Free America (now Partnership to End Addiction), drugfree.org. Twirling in a Beam of Light, a book of her poetry on love, motherhood, grief, loss and spirituality, is slated for publication in April 2024. A resident of Delray Beach, Florida, Judy is the mother of two adult sons and grandmother to four girls.

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